Today I had a day with just my oldest. It’s not very often that i get alone time with one of the older two, in fact I genuinely can’t remember the last time it happened. They come as a pair. There is just over a year between them so my toddler phase with #1 merges into newborn hell with #2. Mostly, I love my small age gap, however I am not above admitting that sometimes it is utterly horrendous. Recently, it has been quite horrendous. They openly admit that they don’t like each other. #1 is a very grown up 7, #2 a not so grown up 6. They rub each other up the wrong way a LOT. They are typical sisters I suppose, except they live in my house so obviously they are the noisiest, most attitude laden children that exist. I spend the majority of my time shouting (I’m not one of those perfect parent you’ll be pleased to know).

However, today, it was just me and #1. We ventured to Glentress (near Innerleithen – see Event #4) to watch my cousin’s (and #1’s Godmother) significant other participate in a 5 stage mountain biking event. It rained, a lot. But it was pretty awesome too.

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Seriously, one child? Piece of piss. Why did I ever think that she needed a sibling? Bio Dad #1 I am sorry for coercing you into making another one. We should’ve stuck at one.

Now, I am in no way saying I don’t love my girls. I do. With all my being. I have (in my own bias opinion) the three most amazing kids that exist (mostly. see previously mentioned attitude). BUT all three of them together, when it’s just me floundering around on my own, yeah that shit gets hard, and stressful, really quickly. It was stressless today, and a really nice glimpse into the gorgeous tom boy that my eldest child is becoming. She LOVED being outdoors today, she loves being outdoors all of the time. She is funny, she is cool, and she now wants to race mountain bikes. Great. I genuinely would not have had the same time had I had #2 and/or #3 there today. #2 HATES walking. Anywhere. Seriously, she won’t walk 100m without crying. Shut the fuck up already. #3 is 2. She wouldn’t care where we were, she’s eating the sheep shit and I’ve forgotten to bring new nappies. But just having one child? We had an awesome day. She cheered on the bikers coming down the last stage, she went out and explored on her own, she conned me out of a biking t shirt and she didn’t moan once about the rain or wind. She was in her element and so was I.

But when we gotΒ home about 3pm it was so lovely to be back with the other little dictators. (My lovely mum and kept them amused for me while I indulged my only child status) As much as today was nice, I do genuinely love the chaos of having three small, stubborn, strong minded children. I am stressed most of the time, I shout every day, I probably drink more than I should most weeks but I wouldn’t change a single thing (or child) about my life. As long as sometimes I get to escape with just the one. So I can pretend, just for a little while, that life is easy.

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