What were you doing 3 years ago today?
It was a Thursday, probably unsimilar to most Thursdays that month. Except, for me, it was the day I found out I was pregnant with #3.
In some ways I can’t believe it’s been that long, time has just whizzed past. In other ways, it feels like I’ve lived an entire lifetime of events since that day.
Three whole years. Fuck me.
Today was a normal day, I didn’t even remember the significance of it until Timehop reminded me. But once I had been reminded, well all of the nostalgia hit me like a big old freight train.
It’s very easy to get so caught up in the day to day monotony of life. I am guilty of it, I’m not good with sentiment or soppy stuff, and I’m definitely not a parent who cherishes every moment (those parents don’t actually exist FYI). Generally life is filled with work, and nappies and training and homework and making sure the kids have eaten vegetables and that they’re not spending too much time on their iPads and that they’re getting enough sleep. Sometimes the sentiment gets lost amongst the layers of life.
So it was a bitter sweet reminder today of everything that has happened in the last 1,095 days. Three years ago #1 couldn’t read – last week she read the second Harry Potter novel. Three years ago #2 was in pre-school and I was worrying about potentially deferring her school entry – today she is excelling in primary 3 and is one of the sweetest (yet infuriating) children I’ve ever met. Three years ago #3 was two tiny lines on a pregnancy test and I was in a tailspin wondering how on earth I was ever going to manage with another one. Today, today she told me she loved me for the first time.
There are two things I absolutely know to be true;
1. Time is not slowing down.
I imagine in 3 years I will be sitting marvelling at how fast the time has gone. I’ll reminisce about the day #3 professed love for the first time and how wasn’t it cute when #1 couldn’t pronounce some of the words in Harry Potter. I hope the next 3 years heal some of the wounds caused by the last 3 years events. And that when Timehop reminds me I have memories to check that they won’t be ones that keep me awake at night or ones that keep me away from certain spots in town ‘just in case’.
2. Remembering to take time to appreciate the sentiment will get you through the tough days.
You will absolutely not appreciate every single moment. Your baby will shit in the bath, or throw her tea at you. Your partner will piss you off and you’ll have a bad day at work. You won’t run that 10k as fast as you want and you’ll wonder just how on earth your life got to this point. But just stop. Breath. Close your eyes and think of something good that happened today, or yesterday. Think about the way your baby says ‘duckle’ instead of ‘cuddle’. Be sentimental. Sure, there are tough days ahead, that’s also something I know to be true. But there are also amazing days ahead, amazing memories to be made, amazing things to experience and to lock into your vault of memories to reminisce about when things get tough. Remember that.